Being A Simple, Independent And Low Maintenance Woman, Should Be A Good Thing Right ?!?…..

It shouldn’t be hard to be with a woman who is this way and it shouldn’t be hard to please a woman that is, simple, Independent and low maintenance, right??

But trust me it is…. Let me enlighten you about this type of woman.

This type of woman, can carry her own weight, doesn’t ask for help, Is very selfless, genuine, thoughtful, kind, considerate, always helping others in any way that she can, even if it means at times, that she has to set aside her own needs, when someone needs help.

This type of woman is not a doormat. Even though her generosity gets taken advantage of, when she doesn’t realize it.

This type of woman is rare and very hard to come by, even though there are woman out there like this woman.

She’s to much a free spirit, calling her own shots, she doesn’t follow the crowd. She makes her own rules.

She’s always home, she’s very nurturing, she cooks, cleans, she doesn’t require much from a significant other except to be honest, have emotional support, consistency, to be just as mindful, kind and considerate as she.

This type of woman, loves and respects herself and knows who she is.

This type of woman wants a male version of herself.

People tend to get very comfortable around this type of woman. As her nature is very peaceful and calm.

This type of woman is pretty much simple but has high standards in life. Meaning she wants to build something and she’s a go getter. Never lazy or dependent on anyone.

This type of woman can be frugal at times, not because she is cheap and doesn’t want the finer things in life, but because she respects money and whatever she buys has to be worth it.

This type of woman is probably the creative type and looks at life with having more meaning and depth.

This type of woman is not materialistic at all but has exquisite taste with things that having meaning in them.

Men like this type of woman. This is the type of woman that probably most men would try to take home to their mother.

This is the type of woman, that a man would consider, to be “wife material”. (whatever the hell that means???) Most men think they hit the jackpot when they find this type of women.

Some men even find themselves falling in love with this type of woman or moving to fast, as it is probably not that hard to love this type of woman.

This is the type of woman that, they can see themselves settling down with and having a family.

This type of woman could make a man’s life very easy to deal with, as this is the type of woman, that rarely ever argues and her home and having peace in her home is everything to her.

These qualities all sound like the perfect woman, that any man would love to have in his life right?? This woman sounds almost to good to be true, you would think she came from another planet besides earth?!

You would think this type of woman, a man would love and cherish and do anything in his power to keep this type of woman happy. That pleasing her takes minimal effort because with this type of woman, it’s the thought that counts. You can buy this type of woman something that cost $10 or less and she will love you for it, because the gift, came from your heart and the fact that you took time to think of her in the first place, speaks volumes…

This type of woman is very appreciative too and always saying thank you and giving compliments.

Men immediately try to lock this woman down….FAST!!!! As they recognize real quick the type of woman she is, just by talking to her and being in her presence.

You would think that if a man had this type of woman, like all of the above, then love wouldn’t be elusive to this type of woman.

Life sounds like it would be sweet with this type of woman. Right????

Well let me let you in on a little secret…

This type of women who is simple, independent, low maintenance, has the hardest time finding love and the right partner.

I know this type of woman, because I am this woman…

People that know me really well or don’t know me. Wonder why I don’t have the love in my life that I desire. The love that I want is not some fairy tale. The type of partner that I do want, I know exist in some way, because thats why I was shown when I first fell in love, only thing was we were young.

I’m pretty sure that if my first love and I met in my 20s/30’s that we would complement each others lives as adults.

For some reason, it seems like the older I get and the less I require in life and how simple I want it to be, and the fact that I am independent and low maintenance. It attracts the wrong men.

I am not all of the above because I want to be considered “wife material” (I actually can’t stand when men call me that) I’m not competing with other women for a man, ring and a baby. I’m this way, because this is just simply me. I’ve always been this way. Maybe it’s the cancer in me…

I noticed for the last decade or so, that when I do have a conversation with a guy, or decide to talk them, or regardless of where I meet them, men are observing the way I am, the way I talk, the things that I am passionate about.

The very things that I am passionate about, men try to use against me or they don’t even care. They just want to trap me. My last relationship, the guy became very needy moved in on me and tried to keep me from moving forward in life. When I caught wind of what he was doing. I packed his stuff up and it was over.

My independence and how I was backfired on me. This guy didn’t love me for me, he loved the convenience I provided and the things that he did not want to do for himself. He did not support me with what I wanted to do in life. He always had something to say, when he felt it was a threat to him having a place to stay or me possibly meeting someone else.

I’m not that woman, that cares about whats in a man’s bank account or his wallet or what he has at home. I’m not asking him to buy me expensive shoes, clothes and jewelry, or any other material possessions, nor do I feel entitled to them. I care about how he takes care of my heart, my emotions, how consistent he is. Does he keep is word, that when he says he’s going to call, he calls and that he’s on time and respects me and doesn’t raise his voice at me.

That he treats me like a lady and has manners and where his spirit is at, does he have a relationship with God and his mother. How selfless he is and his honesty. I want a man that’s not afraid to be direct and honest with me but respectful.

Whatever happen to calling just to hear someone’s voice even it’s for a minute just to say hi and make someone smile. Everybody likes to be thought of. A guy will know when he’s on my mind (or female friend/family) because they will hear from me, by email, text or call. They’ll get something encouraging from me, they will know that I’m extending a kind gesture and showing love, who wouldn’t want that???

I’ve met some very successful men, in entertainment and out of entertainment, these men are very well off but none of that matters to me, because they were still assholes and they are regular guys… I don’t care what you do for a living, there are just certain things I’m not settling on. Any other woman would have jumped at the opportunity to be with these men but not me…

It’s crazy because none of these things that I want cost money…just effort.

I want someone who sees that I can do it on my own, but doesn’t let me struggle.

You would think that a person who doesn’t ask for much at all, that a man would want to do things for her because she doesn’t demand or expect it like most. Its like damn, getting a man to call back or be in time, you would think I asked for a kidney or bone marrow.. LOL….Men shouldn’t make a good woman feel like an option or something on his to do list even if she is just a friend. When she doesn’t treat him this way. This one sided communication just leaves the gate open for another man to come in.

Being that I’m all of the above, men get very lazy and comfortable around me real quick. They start thinking about how I can better their life and not us as couple/partnership. Some of these guys, I’ve never went out with. Its like they want to skip dating and put a ring on my finger, right away. One guy I met attempted to do that, because he felt like he knew enough about me in 2 hours and 6 days. But he was still married and tried to hide it.

Men are always making plans with me, and they don’t even know if I feel the same way nor do they care. They also like the fact that I am simple and independent because this works in their favor. Some men want an independent woman, because they don’t want to do shit. They figure if this woman has a lot going on, she won’t depend on me much at all.

I meet needy and clingy lazy men all the time. Who pretty much, just want to eat, have sex and make babies and do nothing. These men also want to be taken care of. I made a mistake a few years ago, by inviting someone over to my apartment, a guy that I was talking to for about 5 months, we met at a park, I got hungry and I didn’t feel like traveling somewhere, so he seem pretty decent.

So I took a chance and invited him in, (I figured shit, I have enough info on him, I have a doorman and I texted, my friend to let her know, I was having company and sent her his pic, LOL just in case, I’m single I gotta protect myself). Only thing was, he got lazy and comfortable on me real quick after I cooked. I wasn’t cooking for him, I was cooking because I was hungry, and my apartment was right there.

Me and this guy never went out, there was always some excuse, why he didn’t want to spend money, when we were suppose to go out, he had the nerve to ask me, if I could eat before we went out because he was broke. I never saw him again. He ate at my spot twice and I was like nah, this ain’t gonna work. He was nice, we were never together, Thank god! but I saw how needy he was and how comfortable he was and he threw hints that he could stay in my apt. While I worked. I was like Hell NOOOOO!!

The way men come at me, you would think I’m the last decent breeding female on earth.

I must admit, I am afraid to have kids and get married, because I keep meeting men who just want their lives to be better and they are just selfish. They see women as, someone who cooks, cleans and takes care of the house and that’s it, nothing else. My independence is a threat to this type of man. But at the same time a convenience.

I never knew being myself and this way, would backfire on me, when wanting a friendship with a man and just taking things slow to see where things go. Men will show this needy behavior real quick, when they feel like I will get away some how and this usually happens when I start talking about things, I want to do in life and places I want to go, then they are conjuring up, how they can put a stop to it. My ex try to do this with a proposal. I dumped him. I was only 24. I wasn’t marrying anybody at 24.

Even men that claim they want to work with me, it NEVER HAPPENS!!!! Men have a hard time being around me, I’m always the woman they want and they never can seem to catch me. When I don’t want what they want, forget it, the Dr. Jekyll /Mr Hyde side of them comes out real quick.

A person can’t help but feel invisible when men are, calling them sexy and beautiful all the time and trying to rush them into bed and a relationship and to the altar and it hasn’t even been 24hours. When that’s all people see, its like damn! You start to think can anyone ever really love you for you and not what they think you can give them. Some men (and women) shop for a spouse as if they are shopping for a car and house, it may not have everything they want but they’ll tweak it. The car/house only provides a need that they want, because it can’t talk back.

I don’t know why being a genuine person, seems to attract the wrong people. Regardless of how men make me feel, I will always be grateful to God for blessing me, to meet my first love, when I did and how he treated me, that’s what I want and I’m not settling. So if I continue to make one dinner meals that’s fine. One day I will cook for someone and they will enjoy it and they can cook for me too.. If all I have is my down comforter and music to keep me warm at night, then so be it.

At least I enjoy my own company until love finds me 🙂

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