When you look at this picture, what are your thoughts? Do you think these children are to young, to learn how to clean? (Before I continue, I just thought this was so cute, lol :). It reminded me of when I was a baby cleaning, except mines was a toy vacuum. Who didn’t have a toy vacuum, lol.) Everyone may have their own POV. But here is mine, I don’t think there is anything wrong with this picture at all. Here’s why, because It’s never to early, to instill good habits and responsibility with your child while they are young. A toy vacuum could be a great toy for a young child, to have to instill healthy cleaning habits.
Back in the day, if you are a 60s, 70s, 80, or 90s child, it seems like parents (even the single parent house) had more control over their household. Parents back then did not play around when it came to responsibility? What happened?! Parents back in the day, weren’t trying to be their child’s friend. They knew their role and they owned up to it. There was no negotiating and telling your parent(s) “I’ll do it later”. Later? Hell you mean later?!…..Later would get you an ass wooping, lol. Now, I don’t condone beating your child, but there was no negotiating. If you argued or got an attitude you were disciplined. Kids back then did as they were told.
When you woke up, you had to make your bed, you got ready for the school day. After school when you got home, the first things you had to do was, take off your shoes, change your clothes, put them away, wash your hands, since you just came from outside, do your homework, and maybe you were allowed to have a little snack before dinner. Families back then ate together.
You had to do all these things before you went outside to play. There was no watching tv or playing video games. You also had chores to do if need be. Now a days not so much so, it seems like the child is running the house and the single parents are simply, letting their child get away with not be a responsible child.
Parents are afraid to instill some type of responsibility when it comes to their child. They don’t want to be looked at as the “bad guy”. They want brownie points with their child. They feel it would make them love them more and keep peace in the house. I’ve witness this with all my friends that are single mothers, they are constantly trying to get their kid(s) to clean or do their homework. The crazy thing about it is, they are old enough to clean in the age range of 10 to 17. At that age, your room should not not look like a bomb exploded.
Kids today just have to much, they do. If a parent doesn’t feel like arguing with their child to clean their room or do their homework or any chores, they send them to their room and they have all the gadgets in the world. Kids look forward to being grounded. Anything they can do to avoid responsibility. I’m not saying this is the case for every household, but the people I know, this is so much the case on a daily basis.
I’ve witness the most atrocious living situations and it literally gave me an anxiety attack and sent me to the hospital. One things for sure is that these single mothers, never learn the importance of keeping house. They themselves do not clean and therefore their children do not clean. Their parents didn’t clean either, so it was never instilled in them this type of responsibility. So it’s a cycle.
The earlier you start your child off they better. Waiting later on in life to instill responsibility, you may not have any success. Kids will rebel. Kids need to be taught this by the time they are young. One thing I learned from having a niece and nephew and working with kids, is that kids like to help out, more than you think they do. They really do. If you do something with a smile on your face and laugh, a child will want to do it too. They want to feel the same kind of joy. They think its fun and kids are all about having fun and learning.
Their minds are discovering new things as they observe the world around them. Kids are really like sponges, they soak up everything you do and say. Why not throw some responsibility in their while they are young. I remember when my little angels asked me if they could help me clean my apartment, the next time they visited me, LOL and people looked at them in dismay and like they were crazy. They laughed and wondered. What child likes to clean? They thought I had them up under some type of spell. LOL.
Kids like to be independent. They’ll yell out “let me do it” “I can do it”. Ever notice that your child likes to feed themselves when they get to a certain age, they like to put on their own clothes, brush their teeth, if they see you doing something out of habit, they want to do it too. It makes them feel like a grown up. If you have more than one child, once a newborn enters the pictures, they like to help out too, by feeding or holding the baby. They want to be the big brother or sister and with that comes trust and responsibility.
They saw me cleaning and wanted to help. I made it fun for them, we put on some music and they vacuumed. They helped me fold the laundry and made the bed, swept and mopped. My nephew even cleaned the toilet, lol. Kids like being in a clean environment, it makes them feel loved and cared for. It really brings them joy. Teaching your child responsibility is not teaching them to be a maid or slave, it’s instilling important values in them, that they will later on need in their life, especially when they live on their own and start a family. Responsibility starts at home.
I get that single mothers are tired but neglecting your home and not teaching your child responsibility is not an excuse to keep a messy house. I’ve heard plenty of my friends say “I work, I shouldn’t have to clean” (I heard that scooby-doo voice in my head, lol) repeat that again please?!…then who the hell is going to clean?? The child is not doing it. Some parents can’t get their kids to clean for anything and they give up hope. To some it’s simply not important and that’s very sad.
Since women are working and may even be the sole breadwinner. Some dads are staying home to raise their child instead of day care. Men are stepping up to the plate and being more domesticated. (which is quite sexy :), lol). One of my favorite entertainers on youtube LaGuardia Cross, shows just how much fun fatherhood could be, as he takes us a long his crazy fun adventures with his beautiful daughter Amalah. You gotta see these videos, they are just the cutest :). I love these two so much! The key is to make cleaning fun, to bond with your child. Don’t let your child see it as a form punishment. They shouldn’t dread cleaning. Now you may ask how? Well, besides kids wanting to help just because they want to, Kids like being like adults. Little girls want to be like their mom and little boys want to be like their dad.
While your child is young, and while you are potty training them, you can teach them other things as well. I’m not saying give a one year old a mop and bleach. I’m just saying these things are really teachable at a young age. You can teach the importance of cleaning by teaching them to put away their toys, they do this at school too. Teachers teach kids the importance of cleaning before snack time and nap time. If a child wants to do something like go to the park and you are pressed for time
You can say something like “well mommy has to clean, would you like to be a big girl or big boy and help mommy out”? Throw in a reward after, when I cleaned and helped out, my mom would give me money and I saved it. I loved earning my own money. This instilled in me that I had to work and earn my own money and that no one was going to hand me anything in life. Another important value that kids need to learn, especially the value of a dollar.
There are ways to get your child(ren) to clean. It really is not that difficult. If you are having a problem in this area then, it may be best, to seek help from your parents if they are around or find a support group with other mothers and share stories. The key is to not get overwhelmed.
Children can also help out in the kitchen too. Not only is this a great life skill, it will teach them how to be healthy on their own and when they start a family. It will teach them how to be frugal too. I started grocery shop My mom instilled this in me, I don’t eat out. I cook, my mom had me in the kitchen when I was a baby. It will also give kids something productive to do, instead of watching tv and playing videos games.
I love shows like “Chopped Junior” those kids remind me of myself when I was home with my mom and when I had home economics as a child in middle school. A course that seriously needs to make a comeback in our schools. Because some kids are just not learning these life skills at home. Being domesticated and traditional is not a bad thing, it should be embraced more. Just because times have changed and its 2016, doesn’t mean we need to stop being traditional in our homes and the way we raise our kids.
The earlier you start the better. Kids don’t stay little forever, they do grow up into full blown adults, lol. I can not tell you the many times, that I have heard men refusing to date a woman, because of how a woman keeps her house and women not dating a man because he doesn’t clean either. No one wants to live with a slob. I refuse to live with someone, that has no basic home training. There are people that can live with me, because I’m clean but I can’t live with them.
Parents just remember, you are the parent, it starts with you. Don’t be afraid to instill responsibility in your child at a young age. This is vital and they need this. Know that you are raising a productive child, that will later be an adult. They will go out into the real world and this type of discipline and responsibility will prepare them for the real world, and in all areas of their life. Teach your child while they are young, teach them that this is important and they will continue the cycle for generations to come.