Keep It Real, Try Not To Lie To Yourself And Others

5dbf4e36a87d94f460d0370b3a67e011Normally when someone ask are we ok, our first thing to do is say yes. I say yes because it’s an automatic response. It’s become so habitual. I don’t want to bother anyone with my problems.

I get it, we don’t want to deal, we don’t want other to know that we’re unhappy. We try to stay positive. I’m all for positivity and looking on the bright side and not being a “debbie downer”. But who are we really kidding?!

All of these trapped emotions for what??

But when we are not ok, we have to let others know, we are not ok. I know I’m not and I’m tired of pretending like I am. I know nothing bad last forever and at times, you have to be uncomfortable. But for how long? As a writer, my mind is never quiet, LOL but thats not a bad thing.

I keep hearing, get some rest, don’t stress, things will get better. I know they will but until then there are things, that can be done to make things a little bit more better. I’m not sure if I made a hasty move or what. But I can’t turn back. All I know is that I’m sleep deprived and this is not good on so many levels.

3am-cant-sleepNot being able to sleep is a health hazard. Not having silence and stillness is spiritually, mentally and physically exhausting. It’s detrimental to ones health.

It throws your hormones off, you’re stress levels in crease. your weight fluctuates. It’s not good for your heart and your mental well being.

When I don’t sleep I can become quite cranky and frustrated. Either I’m quiet or I talk to much, lol and I realized how I’ve been acting lately towards myself and others is because I’m sleep deprived and exhausted.

I’ve turned into a habitual napper which is not good.

I’m all for being on your grind and working on your life and all, but there comes a point when you need to take a time out. When you need to be left alone. How can God talk to you, when you have so much going on? When we’re disconnected from God our minds go crazy. Life is not making sense.

A friend said to me, “that I need to spend some quiet time with the God. I need to be still” and he’s right. And I normally do, everyday for hours, when I’m alone. Even when I’m not, I try to quiet my mind and sneak in conversations with him. But thats interrupted. I can be on the train and someone will interrupt me. And I say to myself, did this person just interrupt me and my conversation with GOd.

I know that when God wakes me up in the middle of the night, that he needs to talk to me.

12093606_143957622629283_317915051_nSo I get up for him. That’s our one on one time.  And its whatever he wants to say to me that I listen to him. I seek his guidance. God invented sleep and we need to take more advantage of it, so that we can function.

People that are busy all the time, have no idea how it is for a HSP (highly sensitive person) and introvert to crave quiet and to want to be alone. Just to have some peace and quiet and peace of mind. Is there peace in chaos… NO!

Oh how I would love to work and live in a library or book store, no noise, no talking. Better yet, get my life to a point where I can work from home and for myself. Oh I’m sorry I drifted off to a fantasy land, LOL :). I have got to make that a reality. In Jesus name. Amen!


I’m just praying that my situation, that my life turns around real soon. My mind needs to fast. I hope you will pray for me too. Don’t get me wrong. I’m grateful! But even in gratitude there is realness and humanness. I’m not going to pretend and put up a front, I shouldn’t have to and neither should you.

If you are not ok, you’re just not and that’s life and it’s ok! But know who holds tomorrow and that you will be. Until then, try to get some rest and sleep, Some woosa, lol. I will do my best to get some too 🙂




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