Better Celibate Than Sorry: The Positive Side To Being Celibate

img_2936_2Celibacy, can you do it? Sure you can. I wrote about this topic before but lets talk about it again shall we, because it seems to be an enigma to some people. They just don’t understand how one can go days, weeks, months even years without sex. It’s really not that difficult. It’s really all in the mind. A lot of people who have never been celibate or abstained from any kind sex, can’t fathom. Maybe they have a good sex life, who knows, lol…and really who cares.

But people abstain or become celibate for a lot of reasons. Unless you take a vow and swear off sex for the rest of your life. No one plans to be celibate for years, especially if you want love in your life or you desire to be married or have children. God created sex, it’s how we all got here. Sex, love-making can be a beautiful thing, under the right circumstances with right person God has for you..

I’ve shared with you guys that I am celibate and at times, others have tried to make me feel bad for it, especially men. They were either turned on or turned off. Some men, for some strange reason still want a virgin woman or a woman who has not had many lovers. Even when they have had many lovers. That’s never going to go away. When I tell people I’m celibate, they just can’t believe it. They question it all the time.

Maybe because they look at me and think im getting it on and they wonder how does somebody like me abstain from sex, this is what I hear from men. You’re to attractive to not have sex. Excuse me, but what kind fo dumb shit is that?!, LOL… If I share how long it’s been , forget it, they simply do not believe me and that’s ok. I don’t have a celibacy timer inside my body to show proof.

So what others believe about me, I simply don’t care because God knows how long its been. When one chooses to become celibate it should really be commended. There is a positive side to being celibate that a lot of people neglect. When you are celibate, it really helps clear you mind. You become closer to God. You get to heal your heart. Work on yourself. Celibacy heals other areas in your life that you may  not even realize. Sex , lust can cloud your judgement. It’s a powerful emotion when not under control.

2e9626d6c9f268d70f08c1ea71754d1eI haven’t read “The Wait” by Devon franklin and Meagan Good and I plan to, but I pretty much know what this book is about. I have followed Devon Franklin for a long time and have seen many of his videos and appearances. Devon practiced celibacy for 10 years. It takes a strong man to practice celibacy for that long. He admitted is was hard before, but his faith and his walk with God and how he wanted to attract the woman and wife of his dreams. That is was important that he practiced what he preached and it paid off.

Not only for him but for Meagan Good too. There are a lot of men out there like Devon. Men can be celibate, it also depends on one’s journey in life. When you are celibate, it really helps ward off who wants you, for you and not just your body. When you make up your mind to do something, not just celibacy and you stand firm in what you want out of life. If you don’t want to have sex and give your body away to some random man or woman, you don’t have to.

When I first became celibate it wasn’t for religious reasons, it was for a lot of reasons. To many to list but mainly spiritual. I became celibate towards the end of my last relationship, well way before that because the person I was with, we weren’t doing anything any way, so my celibacy started way before that. The relationship had reached its expiration date. I simply wanted to rediscover who I was, become closer to God.

I was spiritually starving and needed Gods love. I needed to love myself more too.

Find out what I wanted in life. It’s easier to lose yourself in a relationship, (the way some mothers feel, how they lose themselves with their kids and husband.) It had been about me and this person for years and I was starting to lose focus of who I was. I had dreams before I met this guy and without even really knowing it. I was settling. I was not being supported in any area of my life. I was the man in the relationship and I was doing EVERYTHING. I wanted out.

When I decided to become celibate and focus on my faith and walk with God and wanted to evolve. I was born again in more ways than one. I was delivered and I can’t be any more grateful. I’ll reiterate, when you are celibate, it clears your mind. It really does. Your heart can heal. You spirit is clear because it is very true, that when you sleep with someone you take on the lovers, they had before you and every other thing that is going on inside of them.

When you’re celibate you get to focus on yourself and know what goals in life you want to achieve. You get clear of the type of relationship you want. The type of career you want. We all know people who are in relationships with the wrong person, the expiration date is long over due. But yet they stay damaging their hearts even further, knowing they should leave.

No relationship is perfect but love shouldn’t have to come, at the expense of your own heart, your soul, your well-being and peace of mind. 

img_2934_2My celibacy has saved me years of heartache, from being with the wrong person who simply did not want or love me for me. From men who are married, men who have girlfriends and men who just have issues.

I was telling a friend of mine, if it was up to me, I would have stayed a virgin and that’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Through my celibacy I have become a born again virgin and that is perfectly all right with me.

My relationship with God is solid and growing every day. I’m much more happier. If you think you can’t do it, you can. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy at first but it will get easier. Then at times it will get hard, because we all crave closeness and to be loved and desired.

I know the kind of man I want and only time and God will reveal him to me in due time. Not a lot of people become friends first. They just want a physical want met. I’ve never been the type to just want someone who I immediately see. I’ve seen attractive men and nothing happens, LOL. There’s no warm tingly feeling, lol.

I have to get to know someone to decide if I even want to be with them. It may take me years or never and that’s ok, if one does not want to wait. People have every right to get their physical wants met, if sex is an important part of a relationship or casual sex. I’m not naive, when talking to a guy to think he is not getting his wants met elsewhere. I’m sure it must be hard when you are used to having sex.

I’m really not missing anything. I don’t need to feel like I’m missing out. You have a lot of people in relationships, whether they are married or not and they are not happy at all. But yet they continue to be intimate. Celibacy, abstaining from sex is not just about the physical. It’s all about all other areas of your life. Because if you can control that area, you can control other areas of your life aswell. Together you and God can co-create the life you want.

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6 thoughts on “Better Celibate Than Sorry: The Positive Side To Being Celibate

  1. It’s amazing how people think that it’s impossible for someone to not have sex by choice and be fine with it just because they can’t, won’t or just don’t want to. Some even try to shame me because I choose to focus on more of the other areas of my life…I can’t really pay it any mind though. They’re living from the three lower chakras while I live from the three higher. The middle (heart chakra) is the key. Once your heart opens it’s hard to do anything if your heart is not in it (especially sex!!!). Spiritual, mental, artistic (etc.) pursuits also become more fulfilling and satisfying… Well over two years and if not for me reading this, I never would have counted…(at this point, I’m just waiting for my Twin…Lol)…Peace and blessings to you.

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    1. Thank you for your comment! Yes people do operate from their lower chakras…. I can’t…sleeping with some random stranger should be scarey to some. Then its like if you catch something, you have to think about all the people you slept with. Sex can cloud ones judgement. Contrary to what others think, relationships and sex can be a distraction from one pursuing what they want in life, if the relationship is not healthy. A relationship should be a complement. Not a goal. People confuse lust with love all the time. When you take sex off the table, you get to focus on that person and make a decision is this the person I want to share my mind body and doul with. When it’s based off sex, after a awhile, thats not going to hold the relationship together. It will be a thing of, what else do you have to offer besides your bod?!. Just like love don’t pay the bills, LOL.

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      1. Yes. Distraction….splitting energy in too many directions when there is work to be done. Work that would be better done with concentrated energies and efforts…..Same as when we fast. The energy that would have gone into digestion and such becomes free to be channeled into intense cleansing, detox and healing…So amazing.

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      2. I totally agree…sex really does cloud ones judgement…I see how men get frustrated when they can’t be with someone…I remember this guy I met years ago, he was going through something, that I had no knowledge of, until he told me and all he could think about was sex..and he wanted to be with me and got upset. He should have been focusing on his wife, he tried to hide and his kids. He knew I was celibate and he was going hard to try to get me to be with him. I smelled a dead rat. When a man knows a woman is pure in mind, body and spirit, he will try to corrupt her for his own selfish purposes.

        STD’s, sexually transmitted demons are real. Even when somoene just touches you or kisses you. They can breathe what they are going through into you. This guy left his drama in my space. I never saw him again. I thanked God for me and this guy not dating 9 years prior. Because when he saw me again, his agenda back then was the same as it was in the future, to trap me. He already had 3 women with his kids and wanted to make me number 4. Hell no!!! LOL. You get to heal on so many levels when you are celibate. The rewards are so worth it!

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  2. Dead rat…LMAO…Spirituality+Celibacy=Discernment (on the highest levels). I knew one like that to…..Are these dudes all cut from the same template or is it some carbon copy type stuff? ……I don’t know but they all do the same crap somehow…….

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    1. LOL…I’m starting to think they are all the same…They say, “all men are not the same” of course they are not the same, they look different, they act different, but they do the same shit!, lol. This guys with all that drama, tried to hard to get me to see that he wasnt like other guys and he was… it blew up in his face….I remember one time, the very first day we were talking, catching up, within minutes of the conversation, he asked me ‘why are you single?” and my response was “Because I’m tired of men that are taken, that either have a wife or a girl, trying to F me” and he texted me back saying” Are you trying to throw stones at me? I said excuse? What are you talking about? and he quickly said, “oh no nevermind, I dont always know what you mean by text”.

      Did you see what just happened here? He told on himself. Dumb ass, lol. Thats what you get for trying to lie…I had no clue he wanted to sleep with me or anything or that he was married. He called me early in the day and all I wanted was to register his material. But when he saw me, all of that went out the window and he was like, this is the girl that I never got a chance to date back then, this is my second chance. He could have gave a rats ass, about me registering his work. All he saw was sex and his future and a woman that he wanted to be the man and make his life easy, since he was dealing with all these women and children and drama.

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