There are a lot of people out there, that want love in their life but the older they get, it seems to be getting more complicated to find someone who really gets you. As I have said before, love is not complicated, people are. When you’re single you have more time to focus on you and what you want.
You have time to make sure your cup is full. A relationship sometimes can hold you back. And if you have kids, your life is put even more on hold. The people I know that got married or had kids early, wished they could have waited. Now the things they want to do, they don’t have the time for.
Another reason is, the older you get, you have a low tolerance for bullshit and for people who simply want to waste your time. People who just want to be with you, for their own selfish reasons. Some people are not sure what they want. They just want someone who they can be with at their own convenience.
See them when they want. Call when they want to call. Be intimate when they want and if the other person disagrees, they’ll make you feel like it’s your fault for wanting something more and for wanting them to be consistent. Love can not be on your terms and how you want it. It involves compromising.
It involves the law of reciprocity. Why is it that we want what we want but we don’t want to give. What the fuck is this self entitlement for and we haven’t even earned it. Why it is that we want someone to be close to what we want and we ask of things of them, that we can not be ourselves.
I lost track of the men that complained about a woman not being a certain way, but they weren’t that way themselves. Of course this goes both ways with women complaining about men. So with that being said, more and more people are choosing to be single, rather than be in a relationship because they are simply just tired.
A relationship shouldn’t feel like a second job. People are tired of someone else making their life difficult. They are tired of doing everything. They are tired of giving and not receiving. They are tired of the games. They are tired of not being appreciated. They are tired of not being fully supported and so on.
Why do we make someone feel like they are in a relationship with us, then switch and say oh we’re just friends. That’s because in the friend zone, you don’t owe anybody anything. You can disappear when you want. You don’t have to respond to anything. You’re not obligated unless someone is your man or woman.
No one wants to be in a relationship with a magician. Not knowing when you will see and hear from someone. Who has time for that. Communicating shouldn’t be that difficult. No one is busy every single minute of the day and year.
I remember when I was 31, a guy that was interested in me, did not call me and did not take me out or come visit, (he lived about 30 minutes away) just because I wanted him to. I said something he didn’t like and he decided he was going to teach me a lesson and not give me what I wanted. He had an ego.
Thought he was doing me a favor by talking to me, calling or seeing me. He was a dick,. He told me I shouldn’t have mentioned how long it’s been, since we last talked and since we last seen each other. I simply thought we were going to just hang out and catch up, chill at the studio, since it’s been 9 years. My mind was somewhere else, I had no clue this man wanted more.
I didn’t even know this guy very long, we lived in the same building at one point and we spent a couple of hours around each other and that was it. He was trying to tell me that things I said he didn’t like it or telling me that I shouldn’t have said certain things in the first place.
Smells like CONTROL, don’t it?!
He also called me slick and sarcastic. I get this a lot from men. But ya know what, I don’t give a rats ass, LOL. Every time I have an opinion or I tell a guy I don’t like something. They want call me argumentive, knowing I hate arguing. They want to say what they want to say, and even be rude and an asshole, but it’s all good because they are a man.
I’m not going to be walking on eggshells and censoring myself, just because I never know what I say, might be taken the wrong way, because you want to try to control me. To get me to behave the way you want. I’m not a freaking pet. I don’t have time to be treating a man like a baby. How old are we?? More of a reason to be single.
This is the type of bullshit, no one has time for. Just because I don’t want to be equal to a man, in a lot of ways doesn’t mean I want a one-sided relationship either. Both sexes are getting fed up and they don’t even want to live with the opposite sex anymore. They dread going home. A place where there should be love, Peace and harmony
Some women claim men are to needy. They feel like they have a child on their hands, instead of a grown ass man. Or that their partner is extremely controlling and dominating. They feel like they can’t breathe or that they have to answer to a man. Men feel the same way about women to a degree. A relationship should not feel like prison. You should be free to be yourselves. With no conformity.
Two people should be bringing out the best in one another. I don’t understand why people make being with someone complicated. I always tell people the story of me and my first love. We just wanted to make each other happy and just love on each other. People used to tell us, we looked alike, we knew what they meant.
He led, I followed. He was able to be a man and I was able to be a woman and he treated me like the most precious thing in the world. He never raised his voice at me, or me with him. We never disrespected each other. He didn’t wait to see what I would do for him. He took the initiative.
We really enjoyed and loved making each other happy. There was no using each other. We never argued. When he would do something for me, the gleam in his eyes and his bright smile, just because he made me smile and I was happy, is all he cared about. That’s real love. We got excited off of the other persons excitement 🙂
I loved the feeling I got when I did something and to see him smile, Even over the phone when he would receive my cards. I could hear him smiling and grinning. His happiness was all I cared about. I just wanted to love him and he just wanted to love me, that’s it. We were just to mushy :).
Our lives took us in two different directions, and after we parted, he told me the way I loved him, was what he wanted in a wife, and thanked me for loving him the way that I did. That was a great compliment to me!!
Not doing and saying shit on purpose to piss me off…Not withholding love and affection. Not withholding communication and not seeing me. WTF!!!! Men are just different now….and they say the same about us.
The shit men say to me, I’m like really?!! Did you just go there? Are you really an asshole?. I just stay quiet. Men claim I have given them chances, with their shit talk. All I’m going to say is everyone has their strike limit. Don’t put yourself on the bench on purpose.
People can’t understand why I’m single….sometimes I can’t either, lol….but all I know is I have a lot of love in my heart and soul to give to the right man, maybe for the rest of our lives, if the guy freaking acts right, LOL. They just have to stop being so stupid and an asshole on purpose, lol.
Because the type of love I have, and the way I love. How I go above and beyond with my actions. I know that I’m a rare woman. I hear it all the time. I already know I’m too much, I’ve been told. Well God is creating a beautiful love story for me, with a man who will respect my mind and not try to censor me or change me.
Until then, like the rest of you folks, I’m going to remain single. I have peace this way. My life is not complicated with the needs and wants of another. I’m loving and working on myself more and more each day. I’m getting my life in order. And who knows, if someone comes along, as I’m getting my life in order and they can hang in their with me and love me, then I will know that man is a keeper.
What are your thoughts on being single until love comes and choosing not to be in a relationship?