Imagine being able to express yourself in a loving comfortable environment, where you are being heard and understood. When it comes to peace in a relationship, why do so many people think that it’s hard to come by and maintain?
Why do people think love is loud and not quiet? In order to have peace in your relationship, you have to be a peaceful person. When you love and respect your partner. There will be no need to have loud arguments.
People ask me all the time, what makes you upset? People find it weird that I don’t raise my voice and that I don’t argue. When I remain calm for some strange reason it makes people upset. They try to get a rise out of me on purpose. My question is why should I argue? I’ve never been an argumentative person.
I think before I talk instead of reacting first. Whenever I feel a certain way about something. I access my emotional state. I don’t talk when I’m frustrated or angry. I get quiet. I think (and over think) about what I have to say and the effect it’s going to have on the other person. I make sure I choose the right words as to not offend and disrespect.
My goal is to express myself and to be understood and to be heard. If I choose the wrong words it will negate my purpose. If I don’t like something that was said or something that was done to me. I express my opinion about it in a calm and loving way. I have control over my emotions. I can get angry if I wanted to but there are other choices.
I’m human and it takes a lot to make me upset, to the point that I raise my voice or I argue. I don’t like arguing in the first place. I’m a very opinionated woman. If I don’t like something you will know. It will be written all over my face. One of my relationships, we never argued. When two people respect one another and they are careful with each others heart and emotions, there is no need to argue.
When a person argues with another person, there’s always something that is being suppressed. Their anger is being directed to you for some particular reason. The problem might be you, other times it has nothing to do with you at all. Thats why it’s important to listen to your partner and to communicate with them and to choose peace.
If you see your partner is upset. BE their peace and take control of conversation in a loving way. Ask them to breathe, touch them, take their hand. Embrace them. Smile at them. Keep your voice mellow. Usually when one person is calm, it makes the other person calm. Sometimes people just have a hard time expressing themselves.
I sometimes don’t get why people argue when there is a conflict. Why not choose peace and love over conflict and ego. If your goal is to be understood and heard, to feel important and that you matter. Calm down. Have a conversation with yourself and God before you bring negative emotions and energy towards another person.
It feels good to have peace. It means you respect each other. You agree to disagree. It shows that you set your ego aside. It makes you express yourself even more and to lean into your partner, instead of turning away from them during difficult times. Really take a breath. If it’s not going to matter in 5 years, then it shouldn’t matter in 5 seconds.
Always remember to be kind to your significant other no matter how angry or frustrated you may get. Communication is the key but it must be peaceful. Choose your words wisely. Remember love is not loud. Love is peaceful and quiet. Love is respectful and inspiring.
I love the quote below by Denzel Washington but of course this goes both ways. Be each others peace. Because peace really is possible in a relationship.