Reflection: It’s My Birthday

2018 a universal year, an 11 year… Today is an 11 day, I’m an 11. The vibration of this day is insane.

You know what else makes this day even more special?

Today is my birthday ย ๐ŸŽ‚ย ๐ŸŽย ๐Ÿฐย ๐ŸŽˆย ๐Ÿ’ฅย  Yeah… I’m a July 4th baby.

Yessss!! I’m 38 years young. ๐ŸŽถย ๐ŸŽถย Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday tooo me, happy birthday to me ๐Ÿ˜ย Can you hear me singing? ๐Ÿ˜Š

God is good!!!! Another year that I am blessed to see. Before my birthday ushered in, I was reflecting on every thing that happened during the year of me being 37. I had a talk with God. I had a talk with myself. I prayed. I sat in silence. I listen to some music and I just exhaled.

This has been some year and it is going by so quickly. Time… It really does fly by. I was thinking about how much I’ve evolved every day. How much I continue to learn about myself and love myself, even with all the bumps and turns on this journey called life.

I thought about all the special people I met, you know who you are ๐Ÿ˜Š

Lets not forget about the uninvited drama, lol. If only you knew, lol. But what’s life without a little craziness. I do my best to stay away from drama but it just some how seems to find me. But I realize that everyone is going through something and in the midst of all the craziness is an opportunity to learn and love or avoid and move on.

Turning 38 is a big deal for me like every year, because It’s a blessing to be alive.ย I remembered when I was 14 and how my whole world changed when my mother transitioned. I honestly didn’t think I would make it. Seeing another birthday was the furthest thing on my mind but somehow I made it. God kept me and he continues to keep me.

Sometimes when we speak love over ourselves it seems a bit weird in some way, because the world is not used to people loving who they are. Or being proud of who you are and what one has accomplished. But I love myself. I love myself. I love myself, I love myself. Say it with me. ” I LOVE MYSELF” Shout it to the heavens. I LOVE MYSELF. Now doesn’t that feel good?

Let that self-love marinate in your divine temple. Sit with that for a moment.

Even with things not so great I love myself through it all because all I have is me and I’m responsible for my thoughts and my emotions and I get to make a choice about how I feel moment by moment. Most people are afraid to spend time with themselves, I revel in it. I enjoy my own company.

I been through some s๐Ÿคฌย in my life, lol. Stuff the average person would have checked out already, but I know that a bad day, a few months does not equal a bad life.ย I want to see what God is going to do with everything that I’ve been through. I want to see how he is going to continue to use me.

I know that my life will not be in vain. I know that in my darkest moments and in solitude there’s answers and a time to go within and learn. Getting older does not phase me in the least. So many people do not want to age. Getting older is really a blessing, it’s a privilege that many don’t get to see.

You can plan your day and plan your life, but truth is, you never know how its going to go or who you are going to meet. So are we ever really prepared? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. You can’t plan every moment and outcome. Then you’ll never be able to enjoy life being a control freak.

As I was reflecting… I was listening to one of my favorite love songs and it just made me feel sensual and beautiful. Like a woman. Oh those lyrics that were all over my body… Oh you know I had to go there ๐Ÿ˜‰. The song I was listening to just puts me in a pure state of hypnotic ecstasy.

I love surrendering to that feeling and energy of music. To me it’s Nirvana.ย It was just nice laying there listening to that love song, as high as I could get the volume. I was grateful for that song for it healed my heart. It was heaven-sent. It reminded me of how beautiful love is. How beautiful love-making is. That it is gentle, kind, tender, romantic and sensual.

That love… real true passionate love waits and is something that shouldn’t be rushed.ย To just let it come to you. If your intention is right. It will come. Most people would never know that feeling. I wish most people would just surrender to love when its real and true. I wish most people would stop being afraid.

I love being alive and being able to be myself and feel. I don’t have to be in control all the time. I don’t have to suppress my sensual emotions. I get to be me. It makes me feel beautiful on the inside. Even though it may not look like it. This journey called life is beautiful even with adversity.

Even when you don’t understand it but it is meant to be lived. I thank God for always providing when I had no clue how I would make it. I thank God for my loving spirit when it could have been broken so many times.

I thank God for given me chance after chance, even when I didn’t want to be obedient, because I felt like I didn’t have the strength to carry out what I was called to do.

By being obedient I was able to help someone and be their voice and strength and offer them hope. I thank God for my wisdom and my discernment and for my sound mind.

I thank God for music and for all the beautiful real artist whose music is a part of my DNA. I thank God for my angelic mother. One of my greatest complements is that you allowed me to be her daughter.

I thank God for giving me back my passion to write. I had no passion to write. I thought my passion for writing was lost and gone forever but nothing is ever lost. It just needs to be sparked and revisited again.

I thank you all for reading my writings. Years ago I didn’t want to let anyone in, but by sharing who I am and what I’ve been through and whats on my mind, it has allowed me to be a part of your world too. I thank everyone who takes time out of their life to read my writings. Those who subscribe and comment. It means so much to me.

Happy birthday to all the Cancers and July babies. It’s cancer season, you know we’re the best sign ๐Ÿ˜Š.

Light and love โœจ๐Ÿ’—

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2 thoughts on “Reflection: It’s My Birthday

  1. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaapy happy belated birthday girl!
    This is awesome. I actually said out loud …’I LOVE MYSELF!’
    Cheers to 38.
    God bless your journey. ๐Ÿ™‚


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